Train, then let go!

Dear Friends,
The sun is shining on this gorgeous Sunday and I invite you to take advantage of the morning hoursto move your body in gratitude and preparation for the coming week.
It seems like ages ago (probably because it was) that I was sitting in the bleachers watching our son’s soccer team being crushed by another school’s superior team.  The coach of our son’s team kept barking instructions to his players; his face disfigured and red with exasperation. One of the mothers on our team, unable to control herself any longer as she watched her son’s spirit visibly deflate with each brusque order, shouted to the coach that his job was to train the kids during practice and let them play during games.  “You have to trust them to put their learning to use,” she concluded.
The coach did not acknowledge that he heard her statement.  I can’t remember what the score was but I know we lost the game by a wide margin.  The kids came off the field slumped by the defeat but even more by the coach’s visible disappointment.  I never forgot this event and the mother’s comment has been with me since.  I remember her conclusion whenever I feel myself about to direct people who have been previously ‘trained’ for what they are doing.
Our two younger children were homeschooled.  We did not have religious reasons for doing this; it was a matter of practicality when viewed from the lenses of what we thought their college experience would be.  The schools we had tried before homeschooling did not meet our needs or expectations and a proper education is something that is held in high esteem in our family.  After initial adjustment for
all of us, we devised a workable system and the years went by very quickly.   Our youngest has just begun college in New York.
Last week she was on campus for many orientations.  My heart wrenched when I thought of my little girl all alone on a campus with no friends and no real memory of what ‘normal’ school was like.  It took a lot of discipline for me to stop myself from calling her every minute but the soccer mom’s words kept coming back to me. Yesterday, our daughter came home and shared with me how she got back to campus on the subway alone after a field trip; how she visited the bank branch near school to make sure her account had been properly opened; how she was able to arrange a maintenance request to fix a broken blind in her room and how she volunteered to read a passage out loud in front of her new classmates!  “I know what I’m doing for the most part, Mom.  You have to trust me.” I smiled with pride as I realized that she is putting
into use all that she has been prepared for.  It is time for me to let her play!
Have a wonderful day and a great week, Marietta

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